My Ear

So i'll continue...

I had a shit night of sleep that night because of my ear pain then in the morning did the worst thing and told my mum about it.   My mum is scared to death of what i do, she really doesn't support me in mma, i can't tell her if i get hurt because she will kick off.  When she see's my legs and arms bruised she holds her face and shakes her head and mumbles things like "my child is crazy"  Bit harsh you may think, yeah i think so too.  So the only reason i told her was because Josh (my brother) for some strange reason asked me how it was.  The previous night he wasn't arsed so i presume as per usual he was just being a grass.

Next thing she grabs my head like an over loving mother twisting it from side to side like i'm a rag doll and asking "what did you do?" "why do you want to make me worry?" "where does it hurt?" "don't tell your father!" "no more fighting i mean it"  fuck sake get off me you lunatic.   I woke up like 5 minutes previous to this and i'm getting a breakfast bollocking. No need!! Nice one Josh.

So once she unleashed me i told her how it happened and the first thing she says is "i don't think you should be doing this MMA anymore"  wow! dramatic or what.  Then i said "oh it's probably just cauliflower ear or something"  which made her even more mad so i left the breakfast room in a shit mood and she shouted "what is cauliflower ear? elle elle get back here!!!!" haha it was quite the comedy performance thinking back. Never ever a dull moment in my home.

That night in BJJ training i mentioned that i was unable to spar.  I didn't think it was a good idea really as i was already hurt.  Felt like a bit of a dickhead telling the lads, but they came over to me intrigued and asked what the matter was. They are nice to me sometimes.

So i showed them and they said  it was the beginning of cauliflower ear for sure and congratulated me. They seemed really excited about it! Elles got a fucked up ear, nice one.  So it became a more positive injury.  Then we all compared our manky looking ears for about 15 minutes in the bathroom mirror. Was quite fun actually.  

They gave me some advice too.

1) buy head gear.
2) wear the head gear even though i will look a dick.
3) go to the doctors
4) if it gets any worse have it drained.
5) stop moaning and start sparring.

Simple. much better than the wrath of hatred i had off my mum in the morning. The pain went after a few days thank god and my mum didn't mention it again.  I'm sure it won't be long before she's freaking out over something else.

I bought my headgear and yeah i wear it ............... sometimes.

Female MMA

Thank you Tyler for taking the time out of your day to make this amazing WMMA tribute for my blog.

You can follow him on twitter @tylerfox29

Dan Hardy UFC 146

Be prepared for injury.

Whether an attack is physical or mental you must be prepared.  Yes you must, but i wasn't... i recall my first fight.

I took on a girl weighing in at 160 pounds with a lazy eye and an arse like the back of a ship.  Do i have your attention? either way, that bit was fictional.   What happened was this, i took a jab to the back of the head whilst on a night out (rare).  The girl came at me from behind and knocked me out. Seriously! Punched me right in the back of the head,  I did not fight back as i don't remember much more.  I hope she broke her hand and couldn't straighten her shit hair extensions for weeks the beaut.  I lost my pride for a bit that night as i went home wearing my own blood and wondering if her fella was proud of his bar brawler bird.  Why did she do it?.. simple: i was bar served before her, she kicked off as she was bladdered with a bad attitude, told me she was first and i told her her dress was a knockoff.  I quit drinking and going out after that for about a year. 

I'd love to fill this blog with tales of me knocking shit out of people and being a hard ass but truth is, i'm really not. I've never had an amateur fight and i know i'll never be a professional mma fighter.  What i do know is that i train 5 nights a weeks, i spar with lads and i am addicted to fighting.  "Just not in bars" It's my life.  To look at i'm just your normal english girl, but i'm bruised and fairly ripped underneath the threads.

MMA consists for me of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai, Boxing, Wrestling and Conditioning.  As an MMA fighter you may study even more martial arts for example Tae Kwon Do, Judo and/or Karate but for me my list is enough.  I work full time and still train in each of these fields, therefore, this leaves me little time for being out with mates and parties. This is standard.  I don't really mind it but if i think hard about it maybe i do! 

I belong to a great team at my training gym, I have my brothers and my team mates who provide the banter and let me lash out too when i am not "getting it."  We learn a lot in 1 hour, it is possible that techniques cannot be performed and executed perfectly in this time frame.  I have this issue a lot and sometimes get wound up by it.  So much so, swear words will come out on an occasion!  For the most part i keep my head down and try to take in as much as possible, i learn and study more here than i ever did at university.

You train, you have a good day, you have a bad day, this is standard and i fail to recognize any person who leaves a training session feeling 100% every time.  We got a new lad in last week, Jimmy his name was, nice lad, must have been about 20 years old,  came to our boxing class and said after about half an hour  "how long before i get the technique! I wanna fight!  I guess he was sick of being told what to do in that his stance was wrong and he shouldn't wind up a hook.  Anyway he had the obligatory roasting about practice and patience.  I still get the coach standing behind my sparring partner waiting to put the pad across my face (hard) because  my boxing gloves are not protecting my face/chin.  So Jimmy, just learn from these guys and keep your guard up.

Boxing is a staple of MMA. I do this twice a week and for those girls who think they sweat on a treadmill, have a shot at this. Your walking out of class like a raisin.  If your at all worried about sweat, wear black cause your going to be drenched, or just don't attend.  Likewise the next morning, putting your bra on or ragging your hair up in a pony tail could leave you feeling disabled.

A couple of months into training i received quite a few blows to my ear, no not romantic whispering breath blows with sweet messages, but a tasty few digs in sparring.  Kyle did it! (grass)  Miss injury prone goes home and instead of producing a body full of bruises from BJJ i have a terribly sore head.  I mentioned to my brother about my sore ear, this was only after i told him to take a picture of it with my phone as i couldn't see it or compare it to the other one..  Josh said it looked a bit swollen but i guess a brotherly glance whilst ramming his dinner in his grid wasn't a doctors opinion and he couldn't be arsed taking a picture for me as one hand was holding the fork/shovel and the other hand was arguing with his girl via text.  So i slept on it (my other ear.)

The next day the top of my ear was pretty much in agony and yeah it was swollen.  It was really sore to touch, itchy and bright red.  I guess anyone with any sense reading this will know already what the problem was.  4 months in and i had "the ear."

To be cont.....

Never Give Up

BJJ lesson 1 - Bruised Ego

Brazilian jiu-jitsu (BJJ) is a martial art, combat sport and self defense system that focuses on grappling and especially ground fighting.  

I'll just run through a list of things imperative to training in my opinion.  Emphasis on the "MY"

1: Wear a rash guard and some tight sports leggings that cover your knees.  Under Armour is decent or wear a GI.

2: Make sure all your nails are cut down as to not slash anyone. Toes and fingers.

3: No earrings or jewelry unless you fancy a trip to casualty.  Rippage.

5: Smell fresh please, i'll be getting into some very tight and close positions with you.  

6: Keep an open mind.  We all suck at times and you will have your ego bruised. 

7: Buy radox or bath stuff for muscle pain. you will need it. (promise)

8: Keep your choppers safe with a mouth guard.

9: Looking pretty at the gym goes out the window ladies, prepare to get pure sweaty and ragged all over the show.  

10: It will get sweaty in sparing however slippy wrists and legs make it easier to escape.  It's a bonus .

11- Check out this video.  Go on!

So my first lesson i can still remember so clearly.  My oldest brother Josh had taken me to get my kit that morning.  He wasn't really that excited about it to be fair but i'd made such a scene at breakfast that he was ordered to take me before i gave my dad a coronary.  His thoughts were  "why is she buying all this kit when she'll shit herself after the first lesson" typical.  I know this as he told me on the way. Too much honesty in my family.

With a face on him that could have turned milk sour he took me to the shop where i was kitted out with Boxing and MMA gloves, mouth guard, hand wraps, new kit bag, shin guards for muay thai and a variety of clothing.  I'll let you into a little secret. I knew all about muay thai, wrestling and boxing but BJJ was a new one on me.   I'd not really done a lot of research on it and i didn't bother. I wish i had like!

That same night i walked into the gym with my brothers Josh and Jamie who train there and they told me to go and sit on the bench and wait for class.  Felt like such a child and then they left me and went off to box.  It was always fine when i'd been to pick them up or watch at the gym but today i had to get on those mats and i was as scared as shit.   I was the only girl and i knew some of the lads already as they were mates of josh and jamie's but that didn't make me feel any better, they were nice to me (in a fashion) asking what the hell i was doing there and pointed out that step aerobics wasn't done here! hilarious! I think they felt a bit disturbed having me there too.  Elle training in our gym? can we still swear? Lad, i can't hit your sister! The fuck?  Get over yourselves. 

There was about 6 lads in the BJJ class with me. The instructor didn't make a big deal about me being new and just told me to do what he said. (i can do that)   Okay, so first lesson, instructor shows the moves and we copy with a partner.  

"Everyone grab a partner"  No one want's to....  Elle and Peter - the instructor just saved me. awesome, yet a little uncomfortable.

"Right Elle the technique is the Closed guard." This is when the legs are wrapped around the waist of the opponent with the feet locked.  "Elle lay down on the mat and wrap your legs around peters waist very tight, cross you feet around him....like really lock them." hang on .. wait a sec.... am i supposed to say hello first to this peter lad or what? Never spoken to him or anything and now i'm laying on my back with my legs wrapped around him.   I didn't say this i just did what the instructor said and didn't look at peter in the eyes. awkward!.

Next up i ended in Side Control. I had to focus on staying tight and allowing no space while controlling the position first then going for a submission, or, in Peters case transitioning me to another position and making me tap.  Sort it out! i'm new! Mr aggressive.

Class went superb though, i had a full hour of BJJ and walked away pretty made up with myself.  I'd done it.  I then sat in a radox bath for the next two days, unable to move my arms and counted my bruises. Some things really don't change.  Apart from now Peter gets a decent fight.

What i learned: The movements and techniques in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu are challenging because you not only  have to move your own weight around on the ground but also the weight of another person. 

So enjoy rolling and leave your ego at the door as i guarantee it will get bruised.

Elle x

Actually wait a second i forgot to add Number 12 to my list of BJJ basics.

12: When you get home scrub your body to death in the shower with antibacterial soap to get every germ off.  I mean it, you can pick up all sorts of infections, not off the lads! but off the mats.

A little slice of Elle

So you've seen my tweets and my blog which i don't write in.  Tonight though i'll have a little whirl about telling you a few things about me and how i started on this mental journey of being an injury prone, bruised MMA student who writes swear words on her hands and never gives a full face pic.

I have a large family, 4 older brothers and a younger sister, seems reasonable to want to be able to defend yourself when your caught up in Harper family arguments.  In that case i thought MMA training would be pretty awesome to have a go at, you know, being on the defense and learning a few tricks to use.  Self defense and being fit would be just perfect. Therefore much to the dismay of my brothers, i joined their Gym.  This still amuses me.

I'd seen where they train before from competitions so i knew what it would entail.

My MMA Gym:

1 - warehouse space
1 - boxing ring
1- cage
1 - women's toilet without toilet roll.
1 - mens toilet with all the toilet roll, robbing bastards.
No showers
1 - sink (to this day i'm not sure if we are supposed to drink from it)
Wrestling mats (sweaty)
BJJ mats (sweaty)
Punch Bags
Bad language and sweat. (not off me may i add) well maybe the latter.
Staph infections.

So the crown plaza gym got the boot and i joined "MMA"

Before i started there i had a grilling off the family, to be careful and not get hurt.   Sound!! My brothers were pissed off thinking they had to look after me! no need lads! you don't do it at home for fuck sake.  My sister thought i was a dyke! lovely, thank you melody. When you leave the table and you can hear them all whispering "she won't last a minute" "i give her a week" then you know what, it's only going to make me want to succeed more.  So 3 years later and i'm still there.  And i'm not a dyke either.

Goodnight and Godbless
Elle xxxx

Remember my Name

Nate finishes Miller

Thai Boxing